Someone
by emsiok
Summary: Songfic, Post Blue Noon. Johnathan is on top of Pegasus again. This time he's alone. Rated T just in case because of the ending.


A/N: Hi, umm this is my first and possibly only Midnighter fic. This is Post Blue Noon. Umm, not much else to say.

Disclaimer: Midnighters: Scott Westerfeld, anything in bold italics: song Someone To Die For, which I also don't own.

* * *

Midnight. Blue encompassed the world. And with midnight came Jess. But not tonight. Tonight he was all alone, maybe for the last time.

**_Before you landed  
I had a will but didn't know what it could do_**

He sighed. It had been six years since the lightning strike that had trapped Jess in midnight. Well, six years for him. Only a few months had passed for her, leaving her still seventeen. He was twenty-three. It was… hard. To live a double life like this. He had traveled all over the U.S., locating and teaching the thousands of new Midnighters. Jess had come with him. They flew from city to city during the blue time.

The other original Midnighters had long since parted ways. Melissa was traveling abroad. She had wanted Jonathan to join her, but he wasn't sure if jess could make the trip across the ocean and didn't want to leave her alone here. Dess was off at some prodigious college on a full scholarship. Dex had 'never amounted to anything' and was stuck in Bixby. Of course, he was really researching more about Midnighters, and watching Madeline. Jonathan had made new friends, acquaintances and enemies over the years, but nine if them would ever match what he had with the other four. And now they were all lost to him. Especially Jess.

**_You were abandoned  
And still you're handing out what you don't wanna lose_**

They could never have a real relationship. She would by the time she was 18 he would be almost fifty. But he kept hoping that something would happen to change things, and now it had. He had a theory. Jess had been struck by lightning, something that should have killed her. But she had been 'killed' at the end of midnight. Midnighters were born at the beginning of midnight. In a way they had two lives. If a Midnighter died at the end of midnight, it would follow that they would only die in one of the times, as Jess had done.

_**You make me drop things  
Like all the plans I had for a life without you**_

It was too tough on both of them.

"_Have you ever thought…"_

"_What?"_

"_No, never mind."_

"_Just tell me."_

"_it's nothing. Its just… maybe we shouldn't be… together."_

"_Like as a couple?"_

"_No, like at all."_

"_Jess that's crazy. I love you!"_

"_But it's too hard. I can't just sit here and watch you get older and die. I don't want to see you die. Couldn't we just end it now, to you know keep the good memories alive and whatever?"_

"_Jess…"_

"_Don't roll your eyes like I'm being stupid! I know you think I'm right. It'll never work out. You'll die. Or you'll want to start a family, or get on with your real life. I'm going to be a little kid for the rest of your life. You can't pretend that everything will be all right. We have to be mature and face the facts."_

"_The facts are we love each other. That's all that matters."_

"_No it's not. Think about it. In a year or two for me, you'll be eighty. You won't want to be stuck with some fragment of your past as a kid that you can't deal with and don't want."_

**_I'm drunk when sober  
The room is spinning_**

_"Are you saying I'm not going to want you when I'm older. Because Jess, that's just stupid."_

_"No, it's not. I love you. I don't want to see you slip away. If you say you love me that much, you would stop this now before we got in too deep and something happened. I've already lost my family. It's easier if we just part now, on good terms, and move on."_

_"Is that really what you want?"_

_"No! But it's what I need. And what you need. You want a family and a real life. I can't help you with that."_

_"I want you!"_

_"But you can never have me. And I can never have you. That's all there is to it." The blue time ended then._

**_You are what I hold on to  
You're taking over  
I find that giving in is the best I can do_**

Jonathan returned back from his thoughts.

Now he was sitting on top of the Pegasus sign they had first kissed on. He would have to time this perfectly.

**_Someone to die for_**

He sat staring at the emptiness beneath him

**_Someone to fall into when the world goes dark_**

Ready to go, wanting to fly one last time… if things… didn't work.

**_Someone to die for_**

He gathered his courage. Jumped.

_**Someone to tear a hole in this endless night**_

Midnight ended.

**_Someone like you_**

**_Someone like you._**


End file.
